This is a wedding season. If you are in the age of 20s, you will definitely experience what I am experiencing right now. You might probably see lots of pre-wedding photos, wedding photos, pregnancy photos, baby photos, or posts that are related to a couple or married life. How do you feel? Have you ever asked yourself when will be your turn? Or have you already planned to have one soon?
For me, I am not yet ready to reach that turning point in life. Even though I am 24 years old now but I think it is too early to get married while most of the women around me at the same age are getting married one by one. I have always thought of getting married at the age of 30s but many people have told me that I cannot stay single until I am 30 years old; otherwise, I will not be able to find a good partner. Then another thought pops up in my mind, what if I choose to stay single forever? What would happen if I choose to be a single woman?
It is not because I have had a broken heart before but it is because I find so many reasons to stay single rather than getting married. Well… First of all, I am afraid of being betrayed and having an unfaithful marriage life. It is my SCARIEST reason! Many married women told me that I need to be ready to accept the fact that 99% of Cambodian men have an affair after they got married at least once or twice. I was like “What the heck? 99%?” Then how am I supposed to find that 1%? They gave me a lot of examples as well as their own experiences. I have started to study this issue whether what they said is right or wrong. I didn’t really believe it at first but I have tended to believe it after observation from time to time. There are a lot of news, arguments, and problems that happen in this society due to the affair outside the house. Some women tried to stand with their painful life because they want to protect their children.
“BETRAYAL” is number 1 on my HATRED list. How am I supposed to get married to this insecure feeling? How can I accept the fact that 99% of men have an affair after they get married? What if I find out that my future husband is one of them then what am I gonna do?
Another reason that urges me to stay single until 30 is because I believe that nobody loves a kind of woman like me. Nobody will accept who I really am since I am naturally imperfect! I have so many silly disadvantages! Who wants to spend the rest of his life living with me?
I am also not a type of “Srey Kroub Leak”. I prefer a married life in which husband and wife are sharing responsibilities both outside and inside the house together. Of course, I can do all kinds of the household like cooking, cleaning, washing, etc, yet I am against the idea that the husband is responsible for income while the wife is responsible for the household. Therefore, I think I am not yet ready to give up my dream, my hope, my goal, and my life to be somebody’s wife who will spend the rest of her life staying at home and looking after her children.
That is why I plan to get married at the age of 30s (in case I meet my Mr. Right) or probably I end up staying single forever. I want to spend more time being myself. I want to explore this word as much as I can because I haven’t had a chance to explore it yet. I want to experience an independent and confident life. I want to be a successful woman.
It is kinda hard for Cambodian women to stay single until their 30s like in other countries. Those who plan to stay single until their 30s have to be ready to accept the possibility of being a single woman. For me, I already prepared myself to be a single woman (forever). However, I also believe that a miracle does exist. I believe in destiny. I believe that if I really mean to be with someone, I will meet him one day. I am happy if one day my Mr. Right shows up right in front of me and makes me believe that he is the one (one of the 1% of men that won’t have an affair after getting married). Because I am not different from other women who wish to live happily ever after like Disney princesses.